ramblilngs

the passage of time. holy crap.
the tree outside my window feels it, the increasing warmth of the summer's sun, the passing of time and the changing of seasons, entire years pass and the tree feels everyday.

the rain comes from the sky, dude.

that voice in my head is a funny one, all condescending and shit. i enjoy that, and shit. the fuck off punk that is cynical and never gives a shit. nor fuck. straight edge punks are different, they have a cause.

man. i've done stuff and i want to tell people that everything works out and worrying is wasted time you could be having fun, but then again I'm poor as shit, i mean I eat and everything, but not as much as I could, you know, more than twice a day. it's good i am working and making money because rent is due and baby needs some shoes. which brings me back to this whole idea that everything is going to work out and i am happy. that is the trick, being happy poor.

no matter how much more money you make it won't change your want to make more money and soon the more money you are making is not enough to be considered more money, it just is money you are making and so you want to make even more money and still you haven't figured out that more money has little to do with your happiness.

not to suggest that money isn't happy, those little fuckers are joy made into paper, but paper burns good and joy is fleeting. besides, i have everything i want right now, mostly. the things i don't have, i feel are on their way. but, working ten dollars an hour part-time is not going to bring bike hostel ownership, or health care.

I would love a job that pays well enough for me to spoil my friends with ridiculous gifts, and money. a job that i want to do, so there is no work and so i could be like:
"want a fancy-pantsy dinner at a hoity-toity restaurant?"
"could you use a matchbox pick-up truck that runs on biodiesel?"
"do you want a computer that wasn't made in the 90s?"
"dude, go to the dentist to fix that empty filling, it's on me."

i am distracted by the underwear ad on my computer. butt, now it changed.

oh, shit. no popcorn. no dinner.

pay your taxes. support your war. today is the day.